One of the books that I am reading recommends that I answer the following questions. The book uses the word Wicca but because I have not chosen any particular path yet I will substitute the word Pagan.
1. Why am i exploring the Pagan Path?
I have been exposed to both the Christian and the Pagan path in childhood and nothing about Christianity ever made sense to me. Why should I feel guilty just for being human? Why would God really punish an entire race because two people millions of years ago took a bite of an apple? Why should I be submissive to a man when I am just as capable as him making the same decisions? It makes more sense to me that their is both a male and a female divinity and I feel a connection with the goddess that I never felt to the Christian God.
2. What were my previous spiritual practices?
Like I mentioned before I was a Christian. I went to Sunday School as a child and even as an adult I have attempted to find a Christian church that felt right to me but it just wasn't going to happen. I have also explored Wicca and while that may be the right path for me I am not sure yet. The "Witch Wars" led me to do research on more pagan paths to help figure out what is right for me.
3. Did any of these past practices lead me to investigate Paganism?
Yes they did as I described above. My mother was also a huge influence in my initial investigation and my daughters have re-awakened that interest.
4. What are my fears in engaging in this path.
I am worried about finding a teacher that may mislead me or try to take advantage which is why I am working primarily with books right now. I do plan to get involved with a local pagan group but as for finding a teacher that may have to wait until I overcome my fear.
Another fear I have is my fathers side of the family finding out. I know that I have every right to explore any religion of my choice but it always hurts to hear that someone you care about is disappointed in you.
5. How will I deal with friends and family members who might not approve of my spiritual search?
This kind of goes with the last answer. I do not plan to share my religious practices with anyone who might feel the need to judge me. If they do find out it may hurt but I will not let them make me feel like I have done something wrong.
6. Aside from transitioning to a new spiritual path are there any other major life events that might impact your life at this time?
Yes, my husband will be leaving for several months at the end of February do to circumstances beyond our control. I will miss him tremendously and while we will be able to contact each other it will be limited. I have taken care of the home and children on my own in the past but it is not easy, especially while dealing with the emotions of him being gone.
7. If I have life events happening right now is this the best time to explore a new spiritual path? Why or Why not?
Yes, for a few reasons. 1. Because this needs to be about me, and I have a tendency to let my husbands opinions influence me so while he is gone that will not be an issue. 2. Without this spiritual path I have nothing, and to go through a difficult time alone without any higher power is ten times worse. 3. All of the books and learning will take up a lot of time and make time pass faster.
Thats all of the questions. Blessed Be
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